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The Breaditarian


My youngest son used to adore lobster. Frequently, we would travel to the “real lobster place”, (thusly named, as the seafood shop had a lobster aquarium), where my sons would choose their live Nephropidae with some consideration. (No. I didn’t bring them home live. The lovely fishmonger did the “honors”, before giving them to me. In the back room, thankfully.)


Butter was melted, and the lobsters were quickly dipped in their last sea, as I narrated in my best Clarissa Dickerson Wright voice. Which is actually quite bad, but a delight to my boys. (If you have never watched “Two Fat Ladies”, try to catch an episode on YouTube. It’s my favorite cooking show of all time.) In a flash, the little red sea insects where dropped on a plate, where they lasted, not long.




Imagine my surprise and confusion when my four year old suddenly declared, over a plate of scallops, “I am now a Vegetarian and a Breadatarian!” When did this begin, I asked. Oh. I think it’s been for a long time, now. But. You ate duck last week, I reminded him. Yes. Well, that was a very long time ago, he explained. Right. A four year old self identifying Vegetarian and Breadatarian.


Having been a vegetarian for a few years after college, I tried to remember my old blackened tofu and spinach empanada recipes. I could do this. He would just have everything we did, hold the seafood and meat. Heavy up on the beans, legumes, and tempeh. Easy.


Did a mama just say “easy”? I know. I realized my mistake as soon as I had made it.


Luckily, we now live in a world where organic food delivery services are common in most cities. Local, organic, pre-measured food, with time saving recipes, arrive as frequently as you need them, taking the guess work out of “what’s for dinner”. Add a portion of meat or seafood for the other’s at the table, and voila! Dinner! And most importantly, you don’t need to struggle with the nutritional math. I hate math.


I’m now a full on supporter of these food packages. You will waste less, cook things that you may not have thought of, and you’ll have enough left over for more interesting school lunches. (Paleo, gluten free, Kosher and other boxes are also available. I know. You get it.) Check out Green Chef


Also, Don’t forget to watch an episode of “Two Fat Ladies”. You’ll love it.


Bon Appetit!

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